Thursday, June 8, 2017

FOUR Oregonian reporters that need to be sent back to the minor leagues

I won't post the full articles today so here's the gist-- Oregon State baseball is in the College World Series, and one of the star pitchers for the team is a level 1 (that means low risk for you outsiders) registered citizen for an offense committed when he was 15 in Washington state. The timing of this article couldn't be worse, and I believe it was a targeted campaign to damage the career of a young man who has served his time as a juvenile. This isn't the first time the WHOREgonian has written such Shiitake-worthy drivel. 

Lets look at the Oregonian Starting Lineup:

Danny Moran: This is the asshat primarily responsible for this damaging article. The WHOREgonian reports: "Danny Moran, who covers the Oregon State baseball team for The Oregonian/OregonLive, didn't set out to tell this story when he began interviewing Heimlich in March for a profile about his success as a pitcher....After those initial interviews had been conducted, Moran performed a routine background check - something we do on profile subjects. He ran Heimlich's name through the Oregon courts database and came up with this: Heimlich had been cited in April for failing to update his sex offender registration in Benton County. Moran requested court documents in Washington state, where the molestation occurred. The public records reveal what happened..." He felt the need to give details about the crime, which of course means that me or anyone with a few minutes of time could find the name of this alleged victim. [DUMMY MORON]

Brad Schmidt: Co-author of the first offending report, then later takes the glory for harassing the President of OSU into denouncing the ballplayer. [BATSHIT]

John Canzano: Yes, Tom, this is the husband of our least favorite TV reporter and Shiitake Award alum Anna Canzano. He wrote THIS CRAP PIECE just to be a self-righteous prick, just like his skanky wife Anna. He's obviously trolling us by calling Moron's piece a "terrific piece of journalism." Oh, it's a piece... of bovine excrement! "As much as second chances are important, I don't know how anyone could put the sex offender's future first. Oregon State shouldn't have a single athlete on its campus who is guilty of a felony conviction involving a violent offense or a sex offense...If you're among those dismissing this as a youthful "mistake" from a kid who deserves a second chance at his baseball career, think first about the damage done to the survivor, who will carry this with her for life." [JOKE CUNT-ZANO]

Mark Katches: Batting cleanup (or is it fuckup?), Katches is the guy who deserves to "Katch" the most heat in this lineup, because he wrote the article trying to justify the series of articles. So he wrote the worst piece of all. It seems that they were anticipating backlash from the Anti-Registry Movement: [M'Krotchrot] (here's his possible criminal record, BTW)

"Some of our readers may say that Heimlich paid for his crime and completed his sentence. Others may argue that mistakes made by a minor should be forgiven, considering that studies show juvenile sex offenders rarely commit additional sex crimes after sentencing. Some will contend that we are undermining both Heimlich and his team as the Beavers embark on a quest to win a third College World Series title and with the major league draft just days away. We considered all of these factors.

Our society decided long ago that sex offenders should carry the burden of their conviction well after their sentences end - and that juvenile sex crimes should follow offenders into adulthood. Oregon wrote into statute that sex offenders cannot be released from their obligation to register with authorities unless they show a judge "by clear and convincing evidence" that they no longer pose a threat to public safety."

This is a big swing and miss. If these reporters were pro ballplayers, they'd be benchwarming for the Montgomery Biscuits or the Lansing Lugnuts. Send these folks to write for the Weekly World News instead. They're still around, I think. Or, just sue them into oblivion. Whatever happens, it is time someone takes down the WHOREgonian. 


  1. Umm This dude who was planning to kill Muslims on a train was a bigger threat than this article.

    But then again wait until Oregon has their version of (Chicago p.d. army of one episode) hit Oregon. See in the NBC on Demand app show they had a scene where Creep Catchers/Infowars type show and a hitman kill a guy that fits the description of a student athlete killed because he was an accused rapist according to the Edgar Welch/Facebook murderer type person.

  2. Wait until these 3 reporters get sued like Alex Jones!!!!